Book Review: The Out-of-Sync Child Grows Up

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After an information-heavy book by Temple Grandin, I thought it might be a good idea to give my mind a little break and get back to a book that I started a few months back, but didn't finish.

And well, I'm glad I went back to this book.

As I was browsing for material to read on SPD, since this book was purchased before R's ASD diagnosis, I looked up on Carol Stock Kranowitz, author of the highly-recommended The Out-of-Sync Child.  It also bears mention that she's also the author of The Out-of-Sync Child Has Fun, the companion activity book of the first-mentioned publication.  I also highly recommend that one, as it holds plenty of practical tips and activities for your SPD child.

But imagine my surprise when I found out that she also wrote a book called The Out-of-Sync Child Grows Up (emphasis mine).  Grows up.  At first I wondered if I should get it, considering that R is only in pre-school at the moment, and that maybe I don't need to read it yet as I do have a few more years before he hits adolescence.

Ah whatever, I thought.  Might as well get it.  No harm in looking ahead a bit and be prepared.

Little did I know, that I was reading it more for me than for R.

So let's get into it, shall we?

Book Review: The Autistic Brain

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When I told my family that R was officially diagnosed with autism, my father went into research mode.  He knew I had already bought some books from MIBF 2017, but he then absolutely insisted I look up on Temple Grandin.

A few days later, my brother, who is currently studying overseas, called me over Facebook Messenger and asked how we were taking the diagnosis.  And, I guess in his way to try to cheer me up and make me laugh, we took this little quiz together.

The quiz is called the Autism and Asperger Quiz, or AQ for short.  As summarized on the page, this is a "screening measure to help you determine whether you might have an autism spectrum disorder (including Asperger's disorder). This screening quiz is not designed to make a diagnosis or take the place of a professional diagnosis or consultation. Please take the time to fill out the below form as accurately, honestly and completely as possible. All of your responses are confidential" (emphasis mine).

A list of 50 questions, people who are on the spectrum tend to score 32 and higher, while people not in the spectrum tend to score 31 and below.

My brother scored 29.

I scored 33.

After laughing about it between us siblings a bit, my brother then asked me if I wanted to order some books on autism since books where he currently is are cheaper.  He also happened to have an account with Book Depository (Yes, I finally got an account for myself, was that impressed with them!) and so we went hunting for books by Temple Grandin.

So when my cousin, who had been visiting my brother, came back home, he had with him the two books my brother ordered in my behalf.  I decided to read this one first, as I wanted to first know more about the brain on the spectrum before I could even think about tackling the other one.

But first, a little biography on the authors.

Book Review: The Reason I Jump

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Japanese Book Cover

Well, I seem to be on a roll.

So let's get the disclaimers out of the way, shall we?

I have no contact with the author or the publishers of the book I am about to review.  To alleviate fears of bias, let me state that I read this book through a really good friend who shared her copy with me.

And to again quote from previous reviews, "I will state that all that will be written from here on are my personal opinions and are not, in any way, meant to be taken as gospel truth or medical advice. I am not a medical practitioner or a child developmental expert. I am just a former teacher, a simple mother, a possibly autistic woman with a child who has autism."

We're clear?  Okay, let's do this.

Book Review: The Conscious Parent's Guide to Autism

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Welcome back to yet another book review.  As I have mentioned before, R's diagnosis has caused an influx of information gathering.  This is the second book on ASD that I will be reviewing, and do expect a few more reviews as the days pass, as I do have three more Autism books on my "to-read" list.

And to quote from my previous review, "let me state that I did not get this book for free. My husband and I bought it while we were at the Manila International Book Fair 2017. So I hope that will put some thoughts of bias to rest.

Also, as a disclaimer of sorts, I will state that all that will be written from here on are my personal opinions and are not, in any way, meant to be taken as gospel truth or medical advice. I am not a medical practitioner or a child developmental expert. I am just a former teacher, a simple mother, a possibly autistic woman with a child who has autism."

Hope that's clear.  Now on to the review!

Book Review: Autism Breakthrough

Looks like a lot in this blog is going to change.

I've always approached talking about SPD by how it differentiated from Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) and other conditions.  But now that R has been officially diagnosed, it's time to switch gears and talk about ASD and SPD hand in hand.

But because there is a lot of websites and blogs out there with info on ASD, I feel I do not need to rehash them in this blog.  I've also talked about before on how children with ASD also exhibit SPD symptoms and behaviors.  So do read up on that if you like.

If you want to know more about the condition, please refer to the following links:

• National Institute of Mental Health
• Autistic Self Advocacy Network
• WebMD on the types of ASD

Now, I advise you to read up on ASD before coming back to read my review of a book I picked up over the weekend, because it'll be very helpful to understand what it is before I ramble about it, especially since I will be using some unfamiliar terms such as stimming.

Okay, we're good? 

Let's roll.

Book Cover

To start this review, let me state that I did not get this book for free.  My husband and I bought it while we were at the Manila International Book Fair 2017.  So I hope that will put some thoughts of bias to rest.

Also, as a disclaimer of sorts, I will state that all that will be written from here on are my personal opinions and are not, in any way, meant to be taken as gospel truth or medical advice.  I am not a medical practitioner or a child developmental expert.  I am just a former teacher, a simple mother, a possibly autistic woman with a child who has autism.

Officially an Autism Family

September 14, 2017.  Yesterday.  The day we officially became part of the autism family.

Looking for schools for R as he enters first grade has required us to update our documents, and one of the things we needed to do was to have an updated report on R's condition with a developmental pediatrician.

The official diagnosis is moderate autism.

The doctor is quite optimistic, as he says R has improved so much but he cannot discount his previous mannerisms.  He thinks that R can be brought to the high-functioning side of the spectrum, given that he has been receiving intervention as early as 2 years old.

He also says it's possible that I myself may be mildly autistic.

There's a lot to process here.

I haven't done that fully yet, but I guess that means there will be more resources for me to check out.  More book reviews, more internet articles to share, more information to process and learn.

It's a hard pill to swallow.  I admit that.  I suppose any parent would have a hard time.

But now I'm trying to learn not to see R through the lenses of autism.

May God help us.  May God enable and equip us.  May God grant us wisdom.

We're Seeing Progress!

It's a really huge thing once your silent child starts speaking.

A year ago, I read an article by Jenn Schleich, that really spoke to my heart.  R's speech delay had caused my husband and I much anxiety, and reading her article really articulated how we felt about it.

Some months ago, it popped up in my Facebook memories, and I read it again. The last part of her post really jumped out at me, I agreed so much with it. I will quote it here, in its entirety for context, and emphasis are mine.

Our speech pathologist often jokes that some day I will come to her and beg her to make him stop talking instead. It’s a joke intended to reassure, but when she says it I know there will never be a day when I say children should be seen and not heard. There will never be a day when I wish my children would just shut up. I will never again underestimate how important communication is; to talk amongst ourselves, to share stories, is to connect with another person. The most essential human ability is communication, because without it we are alone.

So, how has R been doing in the field of speech?

SPD, Abuse and Mental Health

Today's post might seem a little bit all over the page, so I'd like to apologize if it seems a bit jumbled.  But this has been a topic that has sitting in my mind for quite some time already.

I had touched on a previous post about how bullying is prevalent in the lives of children with special needs, and how this also translates to the same effects as one undergoing abuse of any form.  What we haven't touched on is how this then affects the mental health of our precious little ones.

So let's recap on the types of abuse that are out there, as defined by Childhelp:

1. Physical Abuse - the act of physically hurting a child. This includes "striking, kicking, burning, biting, hair pulling, choking, throwing, shoving, whipping or any other action that injures a child. Even if the caregiver didn’t mean to cause injury, when the child is injured it is abuse. Physical discipline from a parent that does not injure or impair a child is not considered abuse; however non-violent alternatives are always available."
2. Sexual Abuse - the act of using sex as a means to break down a child's self-worth and dignity. It is also "when an adult uses a child for sexual purposes or involves a child in sexual acts. It also includes when a child who is older or more powerful uses another child for sexual gratification or excitement."
3. Emotional or Psychological Abuse - "When a parent or caregiver harms a child’s mental and social development, or causes severe emotional harm, it is considered emotional abuse. While a single incident may be abuse, most often emotional abuse is a pattern of behavior that causes damage over time."
4. Child Neglect - This is when "a parent or caregiver does not give the care, supervision, affection and support needed for a child’s health, safety and well-being. Child neglect includes - physical neglect and inadequate supervision, emotional neglect, medical neglect, educational neglect."

Abuse is all about control and power.  And sadly a lot of children are victims to this sick game they play.  According to this article published on July 25, 2016 by the Philippine Daily Inquirer, a newspaper publication in the Philippines:

As many as 2,147 cases (emphasis mine) of child abuse were reported to the Department of Social Welfare and Development (DSWD) in the first quarter of this year, more than one–fourth of which was of a sexual nature.

The figure was nearly half of the total 4,374 child abuse cases reported in the entire year of 2015, according to the Policy Development and Planning Bureau of the DSWD.

That's a huge number and extremely distressing.  And the best way to combat this is by awareness.

So let's look at some of the common strategies used by abusers to manipulate their victims.